coffee and haiku

t-shirt hell

I never heard of T-Shirt Hell until today.  I received one of those email forwards urging black people to direct their ire towards the manufactures of a Gag t-shirt that reads, "Arrest Black Babies Before They Become Criminals" and features a diapered black baby with a pacifier wearing handcuffs. 

Apparently they have already received some angry responses, because there is a disclaimer under the t-shirt's picture that reads:

We are an EQUAL OPPORTUNITY OFFENDER.  Click the "worse than hell" button to the left to see shirts about Jews, the Irish, Gays, Native Americans, Mexicans and virtually all races and subjects.

These shirts are COMEDY, people.  Anyone who thinks we create our shirts with racist intentions is ignorant.  Are Chris Rock and Dave Chappelle the only ones allowed to do stereotype humor?  There is no difference between what we do and what they do.

I decided to look through all of their shirts and see if there were any that I found particularly offensive.  The arrested black baby shirt made me open my mouth wide in that "oh hell naw" kind of way.  It wasn't the only shirt on the site to get that reaction.  They have indeed made a joke about any and everything they can, and while some of them vary from mildly to very funny, a good deal of them are totally inappropriate.

Is there anyone out there that thinks 9/11 is funny?  I know that there are those who will argue that people always make jokes about tragedies later down the line, but little more than three years later is not an appropriate time, especially when we are still experiencing the after effects of such an event.  The "I Plane NY" shirt is in very poor taste.

Is the Tsunami funny?  Maybe I am a humorless twit, but I don't think the Tsunami is funny.  On the page advertising the "I Surfed The Tsunami 2004" shirt, the company states:

We're donating 20% of the profits of this T to ourselves to cover the increase in our Prostitute Petty Cash Fund now that all the low cost Thai 12 yr olds are "unavailable".

I remember how shocked I was when I heard the Matthew Shepard story.  I didn't think it was funny, and neither is the idea of gay bashing.  T-Shirt hell thinks so though.  I just want to know if anyone thinks this is funny.

Maybe I have a unique sensitivity, but there are some things I just won't laugh at.  Chris Rock and Dave Chappelle make a point and move on.  They don't plaster it on a billboard and force us to look at it whenever we are on our way to the market or the cleaners.  I will state again that there are some shirts on this site that I found to be funny, but the Nothing Runs Like A Queere shirt is not one of them. 

I didn't come to bash T-Shirt Hell.  I really do want to know if there are people out there that find these shirts to be funny.  Maybe I am missing the joke.  Even the "Arrest White Babies" shirt doesn't make up for the "Arrest Black Babies" shirt.  They have shirts bashing Native Americans, Mexicans, Irish people and Jews, and they have shirts that praise Hitler for the Holocaust. 

There are some shirts that I would actually wear on the site.  Yes, I am a bitter Oprah fan, and although I love her to death, she ain't gave me shit.  Therefore I would wear my Oprah shirt loudly and proudly.  I wonder if she knows about it though.  Would Oprah think this is funny?

Of course, this shirt could also ruin the possibility of Oprah ever giving me shit on her show too.  Hm.  Decisions.

Maybe the feelings of T-Shirt hell can be summed up in the one T-shirt I would order from their site if I weren't opposed to so much of their other merchandise. 

What do you think?

mona lisa smile

My mother tells me that when she was in school, all girls were required to complete a course in Home Economics.  By the time I was in high school, Home Economics was an option, not a requirement, and I opted to take a computer class instead. Still, there were no teachers at either my junior high or high school that really tried to push students to do more than what was expected of them.

In Mona Lisa Smile, Julia Roberts plays a very forward thinking (for 1953 anyway) professor named Katherine Ann Watson who comes to Wellesley to teach art history and ends up giving her students a lesson in expecting more out of life than life expects out of them. 

Aside from the fact that this movie was a virtual cornucopia of my favorite actresses, I enjoyed this movie because I thought the story was a good one.  In 1953, even women attending a school as prestigious as Wellesley were simply expected to graduate and become housewives with college degrees.  No one expected them to have or even want careers and lives of their own; they were expected to want a simple family life.

Betty Warren follows her mother’s advice.  She has the perfect guy, they get engaged and she is going to marry Spencer Jones who is part of the original Jones’ that the phrase “keeping up with the jonses” was referring to.  She gets her perfect little house in her perfect little neighborhood, and she gets to take a break from classes in order to “set up house”. 

Joan Brandwyn is torn between going to law school at Yale and starting a life with her boyfriend Tommy Donegal.  Giselle Levy is having too much fun with too much booze and too many men.   Connie Baker just wants someone to love her for her.

All of these women come together in Watson’s Art History class, and in rebelling against convention, Wellesley and themselves, they learn lessons in life and love, including Watson herself.

Supporting cast members include Marcia Gay Harden and the hunky Dominic West.

Kirsten Dunst did an absolutely wonderful job playing the bitch, which is something I had not ever seen her do, and Maggie Gyllenhaal left me wanting more.

Overall, five out of five stars.

paid in full

The thing I love most about The Wire is its ability to accurately depict the hustlers life.  Stringer and Avon had their plan down; they ran their business, and they had the game down to a science.

One thing that The Wire really doesn't get into is all the other things that come along with balling out of control - the jealousies, the haters and the petty grievances.

I watched Paid In Full this week.  I had been putting off watching it, because after seeing State Property, my faith in films from Roc-a-fella was significantly shaken.  Nothing against Beans; he was gullier than anyone I know in that movie, but I can't get down or lay down with a "hood" movie that is done poorly.

Paid In Full is the story of Ace, Mitch and Rico, three young drug dealers from Harlem that are based on the actual lives of AZ, Rich Porter and Alpo.  You have heard these names mentioned in many a rap song, but if you are like me, you really didn't know the full story and couldn't relate to what was being spoken about.  These three young men ran the Harlem Drug trade in the mid-eighties, and their names have become legends.  In this fact based drama, their lives unfold before us in 90 minutes of 80's cars, hairstyles and fashion choices.

The movie chronicles the friendship of of Ace, the "boring" homeboy working in a cleaners and Mitch, the dapper young drug dealer.  Ace initially wants nothing to do with Mitch and his drug deals; he sees his sister's boyfriend selling drugs on the streets all the time.  When first Mitch and then his sister's boyfriend go to jail, Ace unwittingly becomes the heir apparent to the business.  I liked it because it wasn't one of those Half Baked, let's be drug dealers kind of movies.  It shows his gradual movement toward that lifestyle.  I think it accurately depicted someone getting caught up.  It also shows how your enemies can be your friends and your friends can be your enemies.  It didn't make the drug game seem "pretty"; it showed it for what it is - fast money, a fast lifestyle and a fast ticket to death or a jail cell.  Drug dealers don't retire; they get arrested or they get killed.  The movies shows this to be true.  It also shows the real effects that the lifestyle can have on not just those choosing to live it, but those around them too, especially the innocent. 

The movie is directed by Charles Stone III, director of Drumline and creator of the "Whassup" Budweiser commercials that were ultimately spoofed in Scary Movie 2. It features Wood Harris, Mekhi Phifer and an outstanding first-time performance by Cam'ron.  I take back what I said earlier.  Cam'ron's Rico was more off the chain than Beans was in State Property. 

After watching the movie, I was intrigued by the story and went online to find out as much information as I could about the movie and the real characters behind it.  After some Googling, I found out that there is a documentary called Game Over (Part 1) on the same subject, and it is available on Netflix.  I have added it to my queue.

I recommend Paid in Full and give it five thumbs up.

virgin records is so-so def

Jermaine Dupri has been named President of Virgin Records' Urban Music Division. Dupri will bring his So So Def label over to Virgin & produce for other acts. "I plan to do for Virgin what Russell Simmons did 10 years ago, when he moved Def Jam to Island Records," Dupri said. "I will catapult Virgin into a young, hip label with chart-topping success."

For the full story log on: http://www.allhiphop.com/hiphopnews/

r.i.p. johnny carson

My mother says that when my brother and I were small, we would climb in the bed and sleep with her.  She said that no matter how asleep we were, whenever the music to the Tonight Show came on, my brother would wake up and sit straight up in the bed and watch it with her. 

Rest In Peace, Johnny. 

i got this in email

it was called "my last day at work" click the image to see it.